The Syndicate

oh cool i finally figured out how to make my pfp fit

Chloe wrote: ↑Thu Apr 07, 2022 5:33 pm do you have a favorite holiday or day of the year

not christmas
unpopular opinion but i really don’t like it, my past 4 christmases or so have all been absolutely awful or had awful events happen around that time and it ruined the season for me

however
i do like halloween and always have, it’s probably due to the fact that i like dressing up in costume (it makes me a lot more confident and additionally if i’m wearing a full mask or something i love not being able to be recognized)
something about it always gets me in a good mood, and the weather is always perfect here around then

Chloe wrote: ↑Thu Apr 07, 2022 5:17 pm !!! trochi!

whats your favorite article of clothing that you own

what flavor chicken wings do you like

what color(s) make you happy

how are you so cool

also ty @dunya for the ping (:

my binder is obviously my favorite smh
but if you want actual clothing
i have this nice plaid button down/hoodie combo that’s really masc that i love (it looks cooler than it sounds i swear)

garlic parmesan if i’m not in a spicy mood
if im feeling like i crave heat then the hottest available option i will Breathe Fire and turn into a hummingdragon
it’s very fun
fun fact spice isn’t a “flavor” it just triggers the pain receptors in your mouth so if you like spicy things….👁👁

blue and purple make me happy because i associate them with love
neon green makes me happy because it’s bright and loud and impossible to ignore (and reminds me of myself)
and orange makes me happy because for as long as i can remember (which isn’t that long but still) i’ve always been strongly drawn to it and it calms me to this day

i’m not cool you’re cool
i’m a giant socially awkward nerd who doesn’t know when to shut up and runs jokes into the ground until they’re deader than a doornail
but you’re cool tho ily

Syn wrote: ↑Wed Apr 06, 2022 7:46 pm What was your favourite subject in school?

biology!
i love the natural sciences and have always been obsessed with everything medical and the human body

Syn wrote: ↑Wed Apr 06, 2022 7:46 pm How much continuity do you share between "alters" (is there a better word to use for this?)? Do they recognize your friends and commitments? Would someone else "notice" when it happens? I read that your subset diagnosis doesn't have the amnesia issue as much, but I don't want to assume that means your system has total continuity across experiences.

there’s a decent amount of continuity yeah, enough so that people irl think i’m just weird rather than someone with DID but i absolutely have memory issues, the best way i can put it is that feeling when you’re half asleep but still conscious
we’ve gotten pretty damn good at masking though so that probably has something to do with it
and most commitments are recognized like if i sign up for a mafia game no matter who’s at the wheel we will play the game to the best of our ability and see it through
however we can definitely have very different opinions on people themselves regardless if it’s shown in behavior or not
sure though people have “noticed” irl and commented on me behaving differently, though again most people just assume it’s just stuff within normal human behavior difference because DID is never someone’s first thought when a person is acting different
online though we don’t have to hide shit and my tone, grammar, and even voice and body language will be different so once you know i have DID it’s very obvious to spot a switch

NANOOKTHEGREATANDFEARSOME wrote: ↑Wed Apr 06, 2022 5:52 pm

Trochilidae wrote: ↑Wed Apr 06, 2022 4:26 pm

Syn wrote: ↑Wed Apr 06, 2022 4:06 pm Have you ever seen positive representation for DID in media?

nope
wish i had
but i did hear that marvel’s moon knight focuses on a character with DID and that it’s done fairly well, haven’t seen it myself yet though

I don't recall whether it's explicitly DID or not, and im not sure how true of a representation of DID it is, but Legion may be worth checking out. It's...without spoiling past the first five minutes of episode one, the main character has superpowers and what is functionally DID afaict*

Worth checking out if that sort of thing interests you, anyways, I know some people don't like seeing something they deal with portrayed in media at times


*in the comics he explicitly does, in the show it's somewhat more complicated/kind of a grey area/ambiguous

ooh i’ll definitely take a look thank you!
and for me personally i’d love to see something deal with my condition that’s not explicitly negative

srceenplay wrote: ↑Wed Apr 06, 2022 4:30 pm What do you like to do to make other people happy?

for someone who plays forum mafia im awfully bad with my words sometimes, so i like to surprise people with little gifts be it drawings, written stuff, or actual physical things

(this is where i plug that i drew the april fools joycat nfts for fol, they’re truly cursed)

Syn wrote: ↑Wed Apr 06, 2022 4:07 pm What are your favourite foods?

favorite savory food is homemade crawfish fettuccine
it’s so so good
like heaven on a plate
god pretty much all homemade cajun food is up there in my favorites

for sweet it’s gotta be oreo truffles
they put meth in those i swear

Syn wrote: ↑Wed Apr 06, 2022 4:06 pm Have you ever seen positive representation for DID in media?

nope
wish i had
but i did hear that marvel’s moon knight focuses on a character with DID and that it’s done fairly well, haven’t seen it myself yet though

Syn wrote: ↑Wed Apr 06, 2022 4:05 pm How do you handle people who romanticize or demonize DID? Is there any way that laypeople can help counteract their damage to public perception of the condition?

i’m not going to lie when i see people romanticizing it i kinda fly off the wall
it just *angers* me so damn much
i would do anything to be mentally normal
and to see people glorifying this and treating it with rose colored glasses like on tiktok
i want to scream

i honestly understand those who demonize more because of all the awful representation, if it’s all you know about the condition it’s what you’ll believe
to those people i just try to objectively educate them as best i can

and if there’s any advice i have it’s just to remember that we’re people too, just traumatized ones
and we’re far far more likely to be the victim of violent crimes rather than the instigators

juliets wrote: ↑Wed Apr 06, 2022 3:35 am Hi @Trochilidae and Welcome!

It's great to have you here and I saw you joined the discord server as well to play video mafia and hopefully to chat with all of us even more!

I just want to say I appreciate you sharing your background with us and am looking forward to getting to know you better. I don't have a question right now, mostly because it's uh 2:30 am and I have no idea why I'm awake lol, but I'm sure I'll have some later!

So welcome and let us know if you have any questions or need help in any way!

lol yeah i’m a real chatty guy once you get me going i will never shut up (be warned)
it was so fun to do the video mafia with all of you even if my connection is dogshit
i appreciate everyone being so kind and welcoming

MacDougall wrote: ↑Wed Apr 06, 2022 1:54 am do u like turtles?

turtles are funky little dudes
yes

Scotty wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 10:26 pm

Trochilidae wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 9:58 pm

dunya wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 8:27 pm do you believe in an afterlife?

this ties into this question below

Scotty wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 8:28 pm

Trochilidae wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 1:52 pm okay first i should’ve probably introduced myself lmao

so hi i’m trochilidae but you can call me any form of that you like, it’s a fun word to shorten
i’m a 20 year old trans guy (most of the time, it’s complicated) who’s been playing mafia on and off for about two years!

my homesite is originally fol, and i’ve played on MU a fair bit too, but i’ve been wanting to expand my communities recently and i’m always looking to improve and learn more
id absolutely love to play a few games here once i learn the site setup and culture a bit more!

so yeah
that’s me

Welcome!

I shall call you
Troch
<Or>
Chili

What’s your favorite season?
What is your favorite animal that you wish you could pet RIGHT NOW?
Do you play any boardgames? Video games? If so, which?
Anywhere you’ve always wanted to visit?

“mafia is so much effort sometimes and it’s painful to go iso-diving intensely when you’re not really in the mood but know you have to
and then i catch myself thinking about the game constantly and keep having to take breaks at work because i had another thought and it lives in my mind rent free nonstop until the game is over”
Holy shit are you me

So you say you are trans ‘most’ of the time- what’s your backstory here if you wouldn’t mind me asking?

favorite season is winter! i live in such a hot area that’s it’s nice to finally get some nicer weather

i wish i could pet specifically a baby ocelot which i call ocelittles
i love ocelots so much it’s unreal
they’re beautiful little creatures

so i’m actually disabled (mild ataxic cerebral palsy) which tldr means my fine motor skills, balance, and muscle tone are absolutely shit and as such i suck at most video games
but i do have a special fondness for skyrim because my dad always used to play it with me and we could add enough mods that my motor skills weren’t that much of an issue

and honestly i’ve always wanted to go somewhere i can see the northern lights
to be somewhere that cold, snowy, and special and to look up and see these shining neon ribbons in the sky
it sounds like a dream come true

and okay here’s where the afterlife question comes in, and the trans most of the time question
it’s common knowledge on my homesite, and some people on MU know as well but i have DID, more specifically OSDD-1b which is the same condition, but with less severe amnesia (and before anyone says anything yes i sadly, *actually* have the condition, i’m working with a therapist for it, it’s not by any means all sunshine and rainbows and imaginary friends in your head it’s a horrible debilitating condition that affects my entire life) soapbox over but i DESPISE the fact that my serious mental condition has become a tiktok trend as you can tell
there are technically 4 “people” that make up Trochilidae, i’m just the one most often around so to speak, and i am a trans man (thus me being a trans man *most* of the time

as for the afterlife…i believe in Something but i don’t know what it might be or look like
i know that part of me doesn’t though which sent me into a massive existential crisis about what happens when i die, if my soul is split apart along those lines, if it would let me finally have peace or be eternally painful and isolating, etc
scary shit to think about for me

(and yes this condition throws a curveball playing mafia but i just think of it as being a hydra, a lot of the times i’m called an illegal hydra lmao)
i function as best i can and there are obviously tonal differences when i play, but i make up for this by trying to make details notes so whenever a different trochi takes the wheel they’re never out of the loop
i’m very open to questions about this ftr

This is SO interesting! Thank you for sharing that.

Thanks for putting that into words. I can’t begin to try and relate. And I’m pretty ignorant in the sense that I haven’t knowingly or personally met anyone with any of your conditions IRL.

I’d like to play with you one of these days to get a sense of this illegahydra


Also I just talked with my mom and she wants to make it up north this year to catch the northern lights. What I told her- if you are in an area that you can successfully see it, that’s probably also all you’ll be doing since it’ll be so dark most the time to do anything else productive lol

not many people have met someone with the condition, it’s very rare lmao
but there are so many misconceptions and it’s such a demonized thing in popular media (split and danganronpa are both godawful examples)

i’d love to play with you too though!

(also is there a feature where you can only quote part of a post these get long real quick lol)

dunya wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 8:27 pm do you believe in an afterlife?

this ties into this question below

Scotty wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 8:28 pm

Trochilidae wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 1:52 pm okay first i should’ve probably introduced myself lmao

so hi i’m trochilidae but you can call me any form of that you like, it’s a fun word to shorten
i’m a 20 year old trans guy (most of the time, it’s complicated) who’s been playing mafia on and off for about two years!

my homesite is originally fol, and i’ve played on MU a fair bit too, but i’ve been wanting to expand my communities recently and i’m always looking to improve and learn more
id absolutely love to play a few games here once i learn the site setup and culture a bit more!

so yeah
that’s me

Welcome!

I shall call you
Troch
<Or>
Chili

What’s your favorite season?
What is your favorite animal that you wish you could pet RIGHT NOW?
Do you play any boardgames? Video games? If so, which?
Anywhere you’ve always wanted to visit?

“mafia is so much effort sometimes and it’s painful to go iso-diving intensely when you’re not really in the mood but know you have to
and then i catch myself thinking about the game constantly and keep having to take breaks at work because i had another thought and it lives in my mind rent free nonstop until the game is over”
Holy shit are you me

So you say you are trans ‘most’ of the time- what’s your backstory here if you wouldn’t mind me asking?

favorite season is winter! i live in such a hot area that’s it’s nice to finally get some nicer weather

i wish i could pet specifically a baby ocelot which i call ocelittles
i love ocelots so much it’s unreal
they’re beautiful little creatures

so i’m actually disabled (mild ataxic cerebral palsy) which tldr means my fine motor skills, balance, and muscle tone are absolutely shit and as such i suck at most video games
but i do have a special fondness for skyrim because my dad always used to play it with me and we could add enough mods that my motor skills weren’t that much of an issue

and honestly i’ve always wanted to go somewhere i can see the northern lights
to be somewhere that cold, snowy, and special and to look up and see these shining neon ribbons in the sky
it sounds like a dream come true

and okay here’s where the afterlife question comes in, and the trans most of the time question
it’s common knowledge on my homesite, and some people on MU know as well but i have DID, more specifically OSDD-1b which is the same condition, but with less severe amnesia (and before anyone says anything yes i sadly, *actually* have the condition, i’m working with a therapist for it, it’s not by any means all sunshine and rainbows and imaginary friends in your head it’s a horrible debilitating condition that affects my entire life) soapbox over but i DESPISE the fact that my serious mental condition has become a tiktok trend as you can tell
there are technically 4 “people” that make up Trochilidae, i’m just the one most often around so to speak, and i am a trans man (thus me being a trans man *most* of the time

as for the afterlife…i believe in Something but i don’t know what it might be or look like
i know that part of me doesn’t though which sent me into a massive existential crisis about what happens when i die, if my soul is split apart along those lines, if it would let me finally have peace or be eternally painful and isolating, etc
scary shit to think about for me

(and yes this condition throws a curveball playing mafia but i just think of it as being a hydra, a lot of the times i’m called an illegal hydra lmao)
i function as best i can and there are obviously tonal differences when i play, but i make up for this by trying to make details notes so whenever a different trochi takes the wheel they’re never out of the loop
i’m very open to questions about this ftr

dunya wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 7:35 pm

Trochilidae wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 7:30 pm chloe
and
chloe
this is because in a game chloe and i were in together, i was scum and chloe wrote a giant wallpost defending me by insulting me and my townplay
it was so so funny

tagging @Chloe to the chat.

you didnt tell me your horoscope! i pretend to know all about horoscopes but i don't actually believe in them, i just find personality traits funny.

OH speaking of do you know your Byers-Miggs personality type?

do you like to watch any shows/movies that you're particularly interested in?

my horoscope is sun, moon, and rising cancer
IM A TRIPLE CANCER
idk what it means but that’s so funny to me
my MBTI is ENTP but when i told people that they all universally say i’m ESFP
so take that as you will

and sue me, i like greys anatomy occasionally but only seasons 1-5

dunya wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 7:30 pm

Trochilidae wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 7:24 pm least controversial
• finding wolves is good

even when youre a wolf!!!

cc: @MacDougall the only person who can bus his team and get away with it if not for mech sometimes getting in the way

yes because as everyone knows bussing is the optimal scum strategy
/j

dunya wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 7:11 pm what's your horoscope?

apart from birds, what's your fav animal?

katze or chloe?

chloe or katze?

fav childhood memory?

cats! absolutely cats
i still have the scientific names of almost every feline species memorized because that’s what i did for fun in high school
i was a weird kid
i still am probably
(the best scientific name is the caracal: *caracal caracal*)

chloe
and
chloe
this is because in a game chloe and i were in together, i was scum and chloe wrote a giant wallpost defending me by insulting me and my townplay
it was so so funny

ahahahahaha
you ask this to the guy with a memory disorder who can barely remember his childhood

dunya wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 7:10 pm

Trochilidae wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 7:03 pm mafia is so much effort sometimes and it’s painful to go iso-diving intensely when you’re not really in the mood but know you have to
and then i catch myself thinking about the game constantly and keep having to take breaks at work because i had another thought and it lives in my mind rent free nonstop until the game is over

this is a whole mood and a half. yeah. i feel this deep in my bones lol.

before my break, mafia felt like *work*

now that i'm playing in a way that is maybe not 100% about winning, but more about "let's have fun playing mafia and try to win" - my focus and playstyles have changed.

so i warn you: be careful of burnout!

i’ve been trying to avoid it
in my last game i specifically tried to “trymedium” instead of try hard with some success
i just have a perfectionist streak a mile long
combine that with severe executive dysfunction and you get a mess in mafia lmao

Arete wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 1:35 pm What is your most controversial forum mafia opinion?

What is your least controversial forum mafia opinion?

not sure how controversial these are but
• real time is the best way to get good reads
• vibes, provided explained at least somewhat, are a pretty good method of reading people
• people *always* have a tonal difference between
alignments and if you say you don’t ur lying
• it’s fair game to weaponize emotions, forum mafia is partly a game of emotional manipulation

least controversial
• finding wolves is good

srceenplay wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 1:30 pm What makes you want to play mafia?

What makes you not want to play mafia?

Would you rather got to the beach or go camping?

i like Doing Things (if i’m not actively doing something i enjoy with my free time i get antsy and irritable like there’s something missing from my life) i like social deduction games (was on town of salem forums before anywhere else then migrated to fol after years)
so combine those two and forum mafia is the perfect thing to fill the void
i also obviously like it on the rare occasion that i do manage to catch a wolf and win the game
no better feeling than that

ok this is going to be a very “wtf” thing to say but
god
mafia is so much effort sometimes and it’s painful to go iso-diving intensely when you’re not really in the mood but know you have to
and then i catch myself thinking about the game constantly and keep having to take breaks at work because i had another thought and it lives in my mind rent free nonstop until the game is over

i’m allergic to mosquitoes
that should answer that

dunya wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 4:50 pm wat is your fav t swift album?

top 5 fav songs?

i’m a sucker for red
ik it’s not a lot of peoples favorite but i have really good memories attached to it

1. starlight
2. starlight
3. starlight
4. starlight
5. lover

as you can tell i’ve cried to starlight so many times and i have no idea why but it hits so different

katze wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 6:33 pm how did you get an interview here before posting a single time here ever

i video mafia’d
dunya asked and i was like yeah that sounds fun
get on my level

okay first i should’ve probably introduced myself lmao

so hi i’m trochilidae but you can call me any form of that you like, it’s a fun word to shorten
i’m a 20 year old trans guy (most of the time, it’s complicated) who’s been playing mafia on and off for about two years!

my homesite is originally fol, and i’ve played on MU a fair bit too, but i’ve been wanting to expand my communities recently and i’m always looking to improve and learn more
id absolutely love to play a few games here once i learn the site setup and culture a bit more!

so yeah
that’s me

dunya wrote: ↑Tue Apr 05, 2022 12:51 pm What would you sing at Karaoke night?

Do you have a nickname among friends?

What is the best gift you have been given?

First thing you would buy (big purchase or payoff) if you won the lottery?

okay ngl i’m that person, anything old school taylor swift
i have every song memorized because my sister made me
ignore the fact that i am a 20 year old man that adores taylor swift

i have a few actually! i’m a bird of many names, Bird, Chili, Trochi, Tro, etc
and that’s just online
irl i was actually called hummingbird in high school because i could never sit still and was always vibrating with energy and it’s where my username comes from (trochilidae is latin for hummingbird), i’ve always adored the little birds
more recently at work my coworkers call me The Sim because i can get incredibly zoned out when i’m focusing on my work (and tend to dissociate often, but they don’t know that part)

the best gift i’ve been given was actually pretty recent, for valentine’s day my girlfriend of about 1 year gave me a hand carved set of 4 little wooden birds (hummingbird, crow, blue jay, dove) and i’m so in love with them
they’re like my cute little protectors and they mean so much more considering the pretty unique symbolism behind them

hmmm probably the first thing i’d do if i won the lottery is buy my mom a pair of savannah cats as silly as it sounds
savannah cats are half serval half house cat and my mom has always lamented about how if she ever gets rich that’s the first thing she’d want
my mom’s given up a lot for me over the years, and it’d be a cute and fitting way to show my appreciation