The Syndicate

I voted Dickhead so I might have a snowball's chance at home.

Well I guess I'm not cut out for mafia. Just torturing their members after they've gone. By the way, Robot Mafia sends his regards and doesn't think I should be lynched. He even dropped a suggestion in the suggestion box, saying we should force feed everyone a world's supply of donuts. I was thankful for the idea, but really, that is so twentieth century.

I get why I'm going down. I've been down almost all my life. I may have led the rebellion against Robot God, but I'm not stupid.

You're just better off voting somebody else if you want a killer. I should know. I live with millions of them. Me? I'm a nice guy. I even correct the pronunciation of the damned.

Heil Hitler a former Nazi once said when he got here. I explained that the word is Hell and not heil and that his former master was in room 666B for his 8 o'clock skinning. It was a lovely, bloody reunion. It inspired one of my greatest hits.

See? I'm not a bad guy. Work with me here.

Ah, my ridiculously circuitous plan is one-quarter complete.

Robot Mafia! Your crimes include bootlegging, murder, racketeering, shooting a porno without the use of a condom in LA, and worst of all..............TAX EVASION!

Professor Farnsworth wrote:I don't trust any of the votes on the Robot Mafia. I think Hermes is trying to make a mountain of a molehill from the Robot Mafia's response without my patented Mountain Maker, which is a clear mistake. I'll stick with my brain-gut and vote Zapp!

Speaking in defense of the bastard that never had the coconuts to take my deal?

I see Fry wants to fry Zapp without reason. Maybe Fry should be zapped!

I've had a very bad day today and where I'm from that's saying something.

Will the three damned explain why they should not be damned more?

Hedonismbot is in hell! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

What? No you can't have more torture. You checked masochist on your entry form didn't you? Listen instead to the soothing sounds of Michael Mcdonald.

Robot Mafia chose to question me instead of accepting my deal.

I rather think we could strike a deal, Robot Mafia. I shall give you your army of the damned and not vote for you and in return I ask just one thing, just one itty-bitty thing: your firstborn son!

Oh, and that you don't vote for me.

MovingPictures07 wrote:

Prologue

"Good news, everyone!" exclaimed Professor Farnsworth as he entered the room. "Today you will be making a delivery to a party!"

"Party!!!" Bender shouted, as he started dancing around and drinking beer, while the rest of the group let out celebratory yells.

"In fact," Farnsworth continued, "It won't be just any party. It will be Hedonismbot's Daily 2016 Bash in celebration of Futurama never being canceled."

"Futurama? What's that?" inquired Fry.

"Oh, just some silly sci-fi knock-off show that has no basis in reality", Farnsworth explained. "Anyway, off you go!"

Farnsworth walked towards the ship with the rest of the crew.

"Uh, professor?" Leela was visibly confused.

"Ah, yes! I will be going with you! Why would I miss out on a party of such proportions? There is no other reason that I'd be going! I'm not hiding anything! Stop it with your damn questions!" Farnsworth retorted.

Leela then saw Zoidberg and Hermes head towards the ship as well. "Wait, so who is going to stay behind and take care of this place while we're gone?"

"Don't sweat it, Leela, I recent hired a few lesser known robots for this occasion." Hermes chimed in. The picture then cut to Robot 1-X, Flexo, and Tinny Tim loitering around in the lounge.

So the entire Planet Express crew, even Zoidberg, boarded the ship as they left Earth to attend a party on a planet at the edge of the universe.

When they arrived at Dogdoo 7, the party was in full force.

"Welcome to the epitome of decadence!!" Hedonismbot greeted his new visitors. "What's that box you have there? Is it the chocolate gallons that I ordered to be poured all over my body?"'

"No," responded Professor Farnsworth, "This is a package for the Headless Body of Agnew. Do you happen to know where he is?"

"Ah, yes, he is currently destroying evidence to make paper smoothies over at the smoothie bar," Hedonismbot explained as he pointed towards the bar. "Tell him that my U.S. Constitution smoothie is late!"

The crew walked over to the bar and saw Richard Nixon's Head laughing maniacally as Agnew shredded paper after paper.

"Oh, hello there, fellow Earthicans!" Nixon nervously greeted the crew. "What can I do for you?"

"We have this package for Agnew," Farnsworth said, as he handed over the package.

"But I'm the delivery boy...!" whined Fry, as Agnew grunted in excitement at the arrival of his new suits. "Rrrrrr! Ngah!!!"

"Hush, Agnew," Nixon commanded. "Thanks for delivering the package. How about 300 buckeroos with my face on them? Here you go." Nixon handed them a 300 dollar bill as payment.

Meanwhile, other partiers grew impatient at the lack of paper smoothies. "Hello? I am Calculon! I don't have time to be waiting like this!" Calculon complained in frustration.

"Morbo demands his smoothie now, as soon all of the human race WILL BE DESTROYED!!!"

The Donbot grew likewise impatient. "How long does it take to make a smoothie?"

"You want me to give him the clamps, boss? CLAMPS!!"

"Hold on there, Clamps," advised the Donbot. "You'll get to clamp some scum in due time."

"A space captain with a stature like mine shouldn't have to partake in nonsense like waiting in lines. Kif, go up there and make me a smoothie, won't you?" Zapp Brannigan requested.

The Headless Body of Agnew suddenly snatched the box and started running. The smoothie customers' voices raised in anger and confusion. "I'll talk to Agnew and get him back here, just calm down and enjoy a Nixon smoothie for now", Nixon's head responded to the customers in an attempt to placate them. In reality, he had no intention of returning, especially with Agnew.

Farnsworth, now disinterested, started to walk away. "A job well done! Now see you later." The rest of the crew followed suit and split up, as they were all intrigued by different happenings at the party. "I'm going to go find me a hookerbot!" exclaimed Bender.

Leela went over to the Blernsball batting cage to practice pitches, but she kept beaning the batters. "Bean! Bean! Bean!" the crowd started to cheer.

Suddenly, something strange happened.

BOOM! A large explosion could be heard all throughout Dogdoo 7. Then more followed. BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!... seemingly ad infinitum.

But eventually they stopped.

Only 15 entities remained alive, due to the fact that they were saved by their safety spheres.

"Leela?! Where are you?!" panicked Fry, searching for the love of his life.

"She's no longer of this world," responded the Robot Devil. "How delightfully ironic!"

"That isn't ironic", Scruffy noted.

"Who are you?" inquired Hedonismbot.

"I'm Scruffy, the janitor."

"Then clean up this mess of bodies and wreckage!" demanded Hedonismbot.

"I'm on break", Scruffy responded.

"No one's on break!" Farnsworth exclaimed as he found the group of survivors. "Someone stole my safety spheres and enacted this mass destruction!! We must find out the culprit or culprits of this destruction. They will pay the ultimate price!" he yelled angrily.

"If someone stole your safety spheres, how are you still alive?" asked Bender.

"I always keep an extra safety sphere in my pocket for emergencies," explained the professor.

"Nonsense! I think you did it!" Calculon dramatically accused the professor.

"No, this is Hedonismbot's party, he must have been in on it!" exclaimed Amy.

The paranoid accusations flew around as the remaining characters tried to figure out the mass murderer(s). Will they prevail? Stay tuned for more... TALES OF INTEREST!



It is now Day 1.

You have 48 hours to lynch the meatbag, robot, or alien who committed this mass murder.

YOU CANT JUST HAVE YOUR CHARACTERS ANNOUNCE HOW THEY FEEL

THAT MAKES ME FEEL ANGRY