MacDougall wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 12:18 amDragon D. Luffy stood prideful atop a tall mountain surveying the valleys below when he was approached from behind by a man in a robe with a cloak concealing his face.
"You, are the one they call ... Dragon?"
"Dark stranger! I am that and so much more. I am the most powerful being in this entire crazy maniacal brain world! I am Dragon. I am God!"
"Okay that's good. I have been sent to give you a package."
Killing Dragon D. Luffy is a really mean thing to do and you should be ashamed of yourself. I am not killing a player on a whim like that just because you asked me to. In fact I am going to give him a present now to make him feel better. Ought to be ashamed of yourselves.
Dragon D. Luffy opened the package. It contained 1 ounce of dank kush.
Dillashaw was a talented and idealistic young cop. He considered Sheriff Cockring a buffoon but tolerated him, knowing that one day he would usurp him as the Sheriff of Ville Clit-Dick Fishmonger if he just bided his time and did what he was told.
It was 8.53pm. Dillashaw had received a tip off that someone knew something about the recent abductions and assault. As usual he was asked to go to a dark and ominous industrial area to meet the informant. He had been told to pull up in front of a storage shed with a green shutter door. Lot 74. As he approached he saw a light pulsating from beneath the shutter door of the storage shed.
"How strange." Dillashaw spoke to himself.
Dillashaw pulled up close but not too close to give away that he had arrived. He got out of his car and approached carefully. He was soft footed, like a cat. He glided up to the shutter door with his gun concealed under his jacket holding it with one hand. With the other he rapped his knuckles across the shutters gently.
The shutters burst open, making a booming crashing noise. A light beamed from inside that caused Dillashaw to jump backwards to protect his eyes. He tripped and fell.
As he regained his composure he glanced towards the source of the light with one eye open and one eye closed and noticed a dark shadow striding towards him. He pointed his gun at the shadow.
"Stop right there. I'm a Deputy and I will shoot!"
"Nah. You ain't shooting anybody tonight friendo."
Dillashaw's gun turned to a bouquet of dead flowers in his hands. The being in front of him picked him up by the throat and with no effort at all tossed him backwards and into the storage shed, straight into the source of the light.
******************************
Dillashaw had been missing for around 15 hours. Sheriff Cockring initially assumed that his young Deputy was just late to work and hadn't bothered tipping anybody off but it was now nearly lunch time and he still hadn't showed up. Who was going to get him an eclair!?
Cockring had just called Dillashaw's girlfriend who told him that she hadn't heard from him. He was starting to consider opening an investigation when the phone rang.
"Sheriff Cockring!" he shouted down the line.
"Hey there. I'd like to report something I saw last night down at the ominous industrial area."
"Go ahead."
"Yes well I noticed a police vehicle was parked there when I arrived for work this morning and thought it was strange. When I went out for lunch I saw that it was still there and thought I should give you a call."
"Okay thank you. Where abouts in the ominous industrial area is it?"
"It's in front of Lot 72."
"Thank you I will come down and take a look. Can I take some personal information please?"
Okie lets ggo back- awesome result, I’m not surprised that lilefer was bad. I probably could have left my vote there, but i was fine on kyle. Good call those who voted him
I am more critical of sprit voters tho
When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather;
not screaming like the people in his car
sig wrote: ↑Tue May 22, 2018 9:41 pm
1. I believe DDL, especially since I’m very confident I’ll be returning soon to the land of the living, I’m very much against lynching him at all and can confirm 100% that he had nothing to do with my abduction. Also screw you boyfriend (figuratively not literally, bet I’ll be tired from my time in the sex cave) letting me get kidnapped gotta say can’t see this relationship lasting long.
How?
sig wrote: ↑Tue May 22, 2018 9:41 pm
29. Juliets and I were abducted by different people, with I’d assume different agendas. I believe her abduction might be a more basic silenced/jailkept type thing while mine isn’t.
How do you know this, too?
I also want the answer to this
When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather;
not screaming like the people in his car
Scotty wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 1:08 am
Okie lets ggo back- awesome result, I’m not surprised that lilefer was bad. I probably could have left my vote there, but i was fine on kyle. Good call those who voted him
I am more critical of sprit voters tho
Why is there anything inherently worse about voting sprit than kyle? Both were viable alternate wagons to lilefer for most of the day.
I do wish our site retained voting progression better. I think the best place to find teammates isn't so much where votes landed as when votes changed, and I was too busy to keep any kind of mental record of that.
speedchuck wrote: ↑Tue May 22, 2018 9:45 pm
I'm voting option 4. It is literally the best thing. If you don't vote for it you are scum.
I don’t like the obvious nodding and manipulation here. It’s like you’re trying to look as good as you can by vilifying everyone that doesn’t agree with you.
When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather;
not screaming like the people in his car
speedchuck wrote: ↑Tue May 22, 2018 9:45 pm
I'm voting option 4. It is literally the best thing. If you don't vote for it you are scum.
I don’t like the obvious nodding and manipulation here. It’s like you’re trying to look as good as you can by vilifying everyone that doesn’t agree with you.
In all seriousness though, I see speed's statement as not a whole lot different from my statements against option 6 last time.
The truth is that he's not wrong about option 4, but what I failed to take into account yesterday (and shouldn't be taken into account today) is that generally speaking a lot of townies will simply vote for the one they think is most fun, best outcome be damned.
If we were to undertake a complex probability analysis, though - option 4 is obviously great.
sig wrote: ↑Tue May 22, 2018 9:55 pm
I suggest DDL brings back Juliet's tomorrow and we can only assume two more people will be abducted.
I do have some information to back up my ideas on juliets and DDL, but I don't see the point in sharing it yet.
I'd say the vig should hit Nova or Jack.
I'd like to keep a very close eye on Nutella, Golden, and LC
Did you say why you’re suspicious of the last 3? I’m curious.
Also, seeing as nova was modkilled right after this and was bad, well, that’s a terrific look for dog. I also liked the bottled up magic that was released like old faithful in your return, siggie my boy
When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather;
not screaming like the people in his car
sig wrote: ↑Tue May 22, 2018 9:55 pm
I suggest DDL brings back Juliet's tomorrow and we can only assume two more people will be abducted.
I do have some information to back up my ideas on juliets and DDL, but I don't see the point in sharing it yet.
I'd say the vig should hit Nova or Jack.
I'd like to keep a very close eye on Nutella, Golden, and LC
Did you say why you’re suspicious of the last 3? I’m curious.
Also, seeing as nova was modkilled right after this and was bad, well, that’s a terrific look for dog. I also liked the bottled up magic that was released like old faithful in your return, siggie my boy
I'm acting strange.
I like sig actively suspecting me. Makes me feel good about him.
JaggedJimmyJay wrote: ↑Tue May 22, 2018 10:13 pm
Elohcin is bad.
speedchuck is bad.
Yes Prolly and so are you.
nutella wrote: ↑Tue May 22, 2018 9:59 pm
Great result!! Wtf is "ISIS Cream" though lmao
Thanks for giving us your thoughts sig.
Voting #4 because it's the most clearly beneficial one. most of the others seem kinda random
nutella wrote: ↑Tue May 22, 2018 11:42 pm
Mm Nova was bad too eh. "Isis cream" and "al-pieda" ok then Mac
Still sorry to see sprityo go. Hope he returns to the site shortly. Rip
I don’t buy that you didn’t know these names. They’ve been in the first post since as long as I can remember. Your joke here sounds contrived “yes, haha fellow baseball fans, I like the New England Red Sox too”
When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather;
not screaming like the people in his car
"What a day for the air conditioning to be busted! Megan fetch me another wet towel please."
Mayor McFuck was sweating profusely sitting in his chair. The crowd outside were roaring demanding answers. In a city of over 400,000 people, it's only two law enforcement officials had vanished.
Megan, hired primarily because she had very long legs and a tendency to wear shirt skirts with her power business attire, strode over to Mayor McFuck and handed him a wet towel. He proceeded to pat it against his glistening forehead.
Mayor McFuck was a fat man. There's no other way to put it. He was short, fat and had suffered terribly at the hands of male pattern baldness. He was also corrupt to the core. He was in his first term as Mayor and had cut infrastructure spending by millions of dollars in order to fund seedy sex and gambling operations. His plan was to turn Ville Clit-Dick Fishmonger into the new Las Vegas, except with more sex and more fish. It was these cuts that resulted in one of the largest cities in Maniacal Mind Zone 12 to only have two law enforcement officials. The people had now come for their pound of flesh.
"Megan do you think they will go away if you flashed your bum at them from the window?"
"Probably not Mr. Mayor. Perhaps you should try giving one of the townsfolk the Sheriff's badge instead."
"Megan that is a fabulous idea. Perhaps Steve the South Asian dry cleaner? Or Kerrod the wandering nomad? Or my bookie, Willy Two Tone?"
"None of those sound like good Sherrifs sir. I do have another idea though. Meet Tom De La Evil."
An impossibly tall and thin man appeared almost as if from thin air and gave Mayor McFuck a shock when he appeared right next to him. He was tall, and he was very creepy.
"Oh... okay. So you want to be Sherrif then?"
"Sure thing friendo. Sure thing."
Tom took the badge. Megan flashed him a smile. The mayor chuckled nervously.
"Okay Tom. First order of business. Calm down the people and get them to go back to their homes."
"No problem Mr. Mayor. No problem whatsoever."
Megan and Tom cackled maniacally. The mayor, unsure of why they were laughing nervously joined in.
Marmot wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 2:14 am
Are dead players allowed to vote? I accidentally voted...
If marmot gets to vote, so do I!
Lunalee wrote: ↑Thu Nov 01, 2018 9:13 amQuin's ISO is full of posts that are actually trying to be helpful to the game. This doesn't look like town Quin.
Marmot wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 2:18 am
That should be in dead lol...
Or should it?
Lunalee wrote: ↑Thu Nov 01, 2018 9:13 amQuin's ISO is full of posts that are actually trying to be helpful to the game. This doesn't look like town Quin.
Marmot wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 2:18 am
That should be in dead lol...
Or should it?
Maybe everyone else is dead and we're not.
That makes sense. I'd never die first.
Lunalee wrote: ↑Thu Nov 01, 2018 9:13 amQuin's ISO is full of posts that are actually trying to be helpful to the game. This doesn't look like town Quin.
Scotty wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 1:31 am
I don’t buy that you didn’t know these names. They’ve been in the first post since as long as I can remember. Your joke here sounds contrived “yes, haha fellow baseball fans, I like the New England Red Sox too”
Nope, don't remember seeing them there. Maybe I didn't read it thoroughly. I didn't think we knew anything beyond there being 2 teams
Scotty wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 1:08 am
Okie lets ggo back- awesome result, I’m not surprised that lilefer was bad. I probably could have left my vote there, but i was fine on kyle. Good call those who voted him
I am more critical of sprit voters tho
Also this post looks bad as fuck. Consider yourself orange scottieboi.
sig wrote: ↑Tue May 22, 2018 9:55 pm
I suggest DDL brings back Juliet's tomorrow and we can only assume two more people will be abducted.
I do have some information to back up my ideas on juliets and DDL, but I don't see the point in sharing it yet.
I'd say the vig should hit Nova or Jack.
I'd like to keep a very close eye on Nutella, Golden, and LC
Did you say why you’re suspicious of the last 3? I’m curious.
Also, seeing as nova was modkilled right after this and was bad, well, that’s a terrific look for dog. I also liked the bottled up magic that was released like old faithful in your return, siggie my boy
I'm too nice.
And I agree that the legwork sig put in is a good look for him. Some folk would have just accepted their vanishing and followed along, but this list shows genuine effort to solve. I wonder if juliets is making the same effort?
Scotty wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 1:08 am
Okie lets ggo back- awesome result, I’m not surprised that lilefer was bad. I probably could have left my vote there, but i was fine on kyle. Good call those who voted him
I am more critical of sprit voters tho
Also this post looks bad as fuck. Consider yourself orange scottieboi.
I am also leaning toward a Scotty vote... I remember being suspicious of Scotty and Elohcin yesterday. Elohcin more though.
sig wrote: ↑Tue May 22, 2018 9:41 pm
34. Disagree with Dunya’s “Girls before mafia” we’re all bros here and following the bro code its mafiabeforehoes :P
Golden wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 1:20 am
In all seriousness though, I see speed's statement as not a whole lot different from my statements against option 6 last time.
The truth is that he's not wrong about option 4, but what I failed to take into account yesterday (and shouldn't be taken into account today) is that generally speaking a lot of townies will simply vote for the one they think is most fun, best outcome be damned.
If we were to undertake a complex probability analysis, though - option 4 is obviously great.
Dillashaw had been in this dark place surrounded by evil creatures for what felt like weeks. Waking to find that it wasn't a nightmare was the worst nightmare of all. The creatures were at it again.
"That reminds me of the time Vanessa tripped over the extension cable in the thrift shop and broke all the nic-nacs and I had to pay for them because she'd left her credit card in the car."
"Not this again. Would you please stop talking about Vanessa."
"I'm sorry you're right, I really need to move on but I just can't. It might be time to take some long service leave I think. 10,000 years surely should have accrued quite a bit of leave?"
He still had not worked out who Vanessa was, or why these fearsome beasts kept talking about mundane things, but ever since he had been here all that seemed to happen was endless dialogue about Vanessa, doors, hoes and the precious.
"Yo Soulkeepahhhh! Where the fuck is Larry?"
The leader of the creatures was back. These creatures appeared to have the ability to come and go from this place as they pleased. Something that Dillashaw unfortunately did not possess.
"Larry left not long after you did. He said he was off to party. You are back from the war in Mind 9 already?" Soulkeeper seemed to be some sort of administrative person in service to the leader. They referred to the leader interchangeably as The Dark Lord, TDL McFresh and just McFresh.
"Soulkeep you stupid motherfucker, you know the passage of time is different here. I was there for 300 god damned years. It was the bloodiest war since the War of Endless Misery."
"Apologies sir. It has only been 15 minutes here. Did you bring the Lady Elves?" asked Soulkeeper.
"Shit homie. I brought the Lady Elves. They're waiting upside. I was hoping Larry was here so I could share the spoils of war with him." The Dark Lord shared a particular appetite for hoes with his friend Larry.
"I am sure he will be back sir. You know Larry though. He parties for centuries on end."
"True, true. That motherfucker is special. Anyway what the fuck is up with this place? Where is that fine ass Juliets?" he asked. Dillashaw had noted that Juliets seemed to also be a captive here, but unlike him she seemed to be fed, kept occupied and entertained most of the time.
"She has just stepped out for her morning therapy. She'll be back in 30 minutes."
"Motherfucker she is supposed to be trapped here in this motherfucking void. How you gonna just let her leave for therapy and shit?"
"Well I'm sorry sir but she just tends to leave for therapy and then come back so it's no big deal really."
"Damn son. You best not let her leave before ..."
"The Dark Lord, he's here! We mustn't let him near the precioussss." the creature Gollum had returned from whatever dark place he had been. Going on and on about the precious again.
"Bitch shut the fuck up about that stupid ass ring." The Dark Lord slapped Smeagol across the face with the back of his hand.
"Noooo The Dark Lord hates Smeagol. He wants the precious. This is all your fault. Stupid, fat, Soulkeeper. You told The Dark Lord that we had the precious, and now he wants it to himself."
Soulkeeper sighed, again.
"Smeagol, I have told you a thousand times, The Dark Lord doesn't need the precious. This Dark Lord is not the same Dark Lord from Mind 7 that uses rings to control all living things there. This Dark Lord likes ..."
"Reapin' souls and scorin' hoes!" The Dark Lord chuckled. "You know it Soulkeeper. Anyways, I'm out. Send Larry my way if you find him. Later bitches."
Dillashaw wondered if he would ever get out of here.
"No, you won't. But it could be worse. You could be stuck here with these idiots forever. At least you're going to die soon," the Spooky Ghost seemed to be the only one here that knew Dillashaw was listening. Even though he could read his thoughts, he never told anyone about it. It was cold comfort to Dillashaw though, since he only ever told him that he was going to die soon.
"I'm not even sure that this isn't all just one person posting in multiple browser windows to be honest."
Kylemii wrote: ↑Tue May 22, 2018 10:33 pm
@Golden is big shot meant to be vig shot? does the fact that it's spelled wrong turn it into a kind of sarcastic genie thing where instead of getting a vig shot the 3 players would instead get whatever a "big shot" is
When I act like scotty, I am not responsible. It's scotty's influence on me.
You'll have to ask Mac what the meaning is. I certainly intended vig shot.
I am extremely busy today so please forgive autocorrect errors.
No, sorry. I don't buy that Golden wrote this poll or the last poll.
Scotty wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 1:08 am
Okie lets ggo back- awesome result, I’m not surprised that lilefer was bad. I probably could have left my vote there, but i was fine on kyle. Good call those who voted him
I am more critical of sprit voters tho
Why is there anything inherently worse about voting sprit than kyle? Both were viable alternate wagons to lilefer for most of the day.
I do wish our site retained voting progression better. I think the best place to find teammates isn't so much where votes landed as when votes changed, and I was too busy to keep any kind of mental record of that.
I didn’t see the need for sprit to be voted for, and I feel like some people went out of their way to keep their votes there. I thought lil was a better option of the 2. You included, even though you were slightly handicapped
When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather;
not screaming like the people in his car
Golden wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 1:20 am
In all seriousness though, I see speed's statement as not a whole lot different from my statements against option 6 last time.
The truth is that he's not wrong about option 4, but what I failed to take into account yesterday (and shouldn't be taken into account today) is that generally speaking a lot of townies will simply vote for the one they think is most fun, best outcome be damned.
If we were to undertake a complex probability analysis, though - option 4 is obviously great.
Ok but I’m not saying that Speedchuck wrote the poll. I’m taking your word for it. Speed’s comment abou the poll is what I’m suspicious of. It’s the school bully that pushed the kid down and when the kid starts crying and the teachers run over, the bully makes sure he is being watched before helping the kid up- the model student
And yes I think option 4 is obviously great, and am voting there, but it’s the way speed talked about it that makes my knee seize up
When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather;
not screaming like the people in his car
Scotty wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 1:08 am
Okie lets ggo back- awesome result, I’m not surprised that lilefer was bad. I probably could have left my vote there, but i was fine on kyle. Good call those who voted him
I am more critical of sprit voters tho
Also this post looks bad as fuck. Consider yourself orange scottieboi.
When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather;
not screaming like the people in his car
Scotty wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 1:08 am
Okie lets ggo back- awesome result, I’m not surprised that lilefer was bad. I probably could have left my vote there, but i was fine on kyle. Good call those who voted him
I am more critical of sprit voters tho
Also this post looks bad as fuck. Consider yourself orange scottieboi.
I am also leaning toward a Scotty vote... I remember being suspicious of Scotty and Elohcin yesterday. Elohcin more though.
Oh yeah? First I’ve heard of it. What are you suspicious of exactly?
When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather;
not screaming like the people in his car
colonialbob wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 8:41 am
I'm on board for a Scotty lynch, because I've had that song stuck in my head since yesterday and maybe lynching him will get it out
what is going on
When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather;
not screaming like the people in his car
colonialbob wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 8:41 am
I'm on board for a Scotty lynch, because I've had that song stuck in my head since yesterday and maybe lynching him will get it out
Scotty wrote: ↑Wed May 23, 2018 1:08 am
Okie lets ggo back- awesome result, I’m not surprised that lilefer was bad. I probably could have left my vote there, but i was fine on kyle. Good call those who voted him
I am more critical of sprit voters tho
Why is there anything inherently worse about voting sprit than kyle? Both were viable alternate wagons to lilefer for most of the day.
I do wish our site retained voting progression better. I think the best place to find teammates isn't so much where votes landed as when votes changed, and I was too busy to keep any kind of mental record of that.
I didn’t see the need for sprit to be voted for, and I feel like some people went out of their way to keep their votes there. I thought lil was a better option of the 2. You included, even though you were slightly handicapped
You resisted sprityo on the basis of a modkill potentially happening. Lilefer was more absent and for longer than sprityo, meaning a modkill was at least equally plausible. Why did you feel Lilefer was the better option?
Separately, did you voice this perspective at the time?
Best Townie, Maffies 4, 8 and 9 Best Scum, Maffies 3 Best Moderator, Maffies 8 and 9 Most Valuable Player, Maffies 7 and 9 Best Roleplay, Maffies 4 and 6 Spirit Award, Maffies 9 Hall of Fame inductee, Maffies 4
Mafia Universe
Mafia Championship Finalist, 2015 and 2020 Best Town Player, 2020
Fiddler on the Roof
[-Mass Effect Mafia banner-]
