Night 2: Karma Police
Some fellers were sitting around a campfire one night drinking Keystone and talking football.
“If Greg Olsen hadn’t a been injured, Carolina would be in the playoffs, no doubt. No doubt in my mind.”
“You drunk already? Cam might as well be throwing to the cheerleaders. After the way he acted like a baby after that loss in Super Bowl 50, he doesn’t deserve to play in it again. Karma, baby. Karma.”
“Okay,” a third man said, cracking open a fresh can. “Why are we talking about a losing team right now, huh?”
“Well then smart guy, which team is it going to be?”
The man drank and looked at all the faces around the fire, as though he knew the answer and delighted in taunting the ignorance of his friends. “Chargers baby. Chargers all day.”
“Get out of here,” one man said and threw his empty can across the fire, missing as bad as Nathan Peterman.
Reeeeeeeeeeeeeee
The men stopped and looked at each other for a moment.
“Y’all got to lay off them beans.”
And they laughed.
“No way man, Melvin Gordon isn’t going to show up.”
“Doesn’t matter. My man Detrez Newsome will take it all the way.”
“De-who?”
“You’ll see. Man does backflips and everything.”
Turrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrn
“Okay, that wasn’t me this time. Or the time before, jackasses.”
The wind picked up and the fallen leaves were disturbed. The branches scratched one another and fought.
“I’m burning the food!” The biggest one there, the designated chef, tried to get his beef out of the fire and did so, nearly dropping it in the dust, which too was being disturbed.
Thhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhe
“What is that?”
“Who is out there?”
SLLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-
A shot rang out. There was a silence and stillness that came into existence immediately with its discharge.
“Who goes there?”
“Good evening gentlemen,” said someone in the shadows. “Don’t feed the animals. Or the undead.”
“What?”
“Oh, and I wouldn’t eat that if I were you.”
The chef looked at his plate and saw that his steak had become infested with locusts, maggots, and decay. When he dropped it, it burst into a cloud of dust upon striking the ground.
They called out again to the voice, but there was no one there.
Quin has been assassinated.
He was
King Ramses, a member of the Mafia.
King Ramses
You are powerless without your slab.
*Secrets*
And by the way:
He never got his slab (of Meat), which is no longer in existence.