U-Pick Mafia Vol 1 - Game Over

#4901

Ville Clit-Dick Fishmonger had descended into chaos ever since the Stargate Portal opened. Shadowy beasts had invaded the town, driving all but only the bravest souls to barricade themselves inside their homes. Mayor McFuck was swinging from a light pole. The new Sheriff Tom De La Evil gazed out the window of the Mayor's office surveying the decaying town below. Everywhere he looked there was fire and blood.

"It's beautiful," he said. "Just like home."

Megan smiled and nodded her approval. That was when Nutella burst into the room.

"You are cum!" she cried. "And you shall die for your pins!"

The two evil doers spun around to face Nutella as she charged at them with a baseball bat.

Just as she was about to make contact with Tom, Megan dove in front of him wearing the full force of the impact across the back of her skull. She immediately collapsed and was motionless on the floor.

'What have you done!?" his voice was demonic. "You will pay for this with your soul!"

Nutella leant back and with an almighty effort she lurched forward and cracked Tom right over the head with the bat, breaking it in two. Tom stood there silently for a moment, and then began to roar with laughter.

"You fool! I cannot be hurt with unsophisticated instruments such as this. You will die now." he thrust out one hand and grabbed Nutella by the throat.

Nutella struggled for a moment before Tom snapped her neck and threw her to the floor.

He walked over to the motionless Megan and rolled her over with his foot. She was dead.

"They will all pay for what they have done to you." he was livid. "Soulkeeper! Bring me the back up bride! It's time to get down."

The hooded demon emerged from the shadows.

"Yes master. She is dying to meet you."

They both laughed until Tom slapped Soulkeeper in the face with the back of his hand. Then it was only Tom laughing.

********************************

Charlie Blackmon walked in and found his missing baseball bat snapped in two.

"Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!?"

*******************************

Nutella was lynched.

She was

Spoiler: show

Elohcin was lynched.

She was

Spoiler: show

Turnip Head has been placed in time out for being a cheeky bugger.

#4902

It is night 3. Get yo freak on.

#4903

#4904

Well cool beans! We got one!

#4905

Maybe I should stop playing mafia

#4906

Turnip Head wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 10:21 pm Maybe I should stop playing mafia

#4907

Wait, I thought you're in time out Turnip Head?

#4908

1. Mostly standard TS rules with the additions of the below.
2. No roles are announced in this here post. People will claim them and what have you but I ain't confirming anything.
3. You are privy to the factions that are in this here game, but not their win cons.
4. Just play the game. Don't play out think the mod. I will mod-kill you.
5. If you are mod-killed just get out. Don't be a douche.
6. This is a meme game. Play it as such. I expect glorious quotes and many fun moments. That is the spirit of this game.
7. There are no vanillas. There are roles that can become vanilla and/or are passive but nobody starts pure nilla.
8. If anything is ambiguous just ask me and I will answer. It probably just means I haven't thought of it.
9. This is a bastard game. Don't get all upset when weird shit happens.
10. I will reveal the roles and alignments of the deceased. Most of the time.
11. It's okay to be a dick in this game but if you hurt someones feelings I will mod-kill you probably. Unless I don't.
12. If you don't contribute much I will mod-kill you probably.
13. My host posts gonna look like dis
14. We got the 48/24 thing happening.
15. I live in Australia so you might get some whack timezone situation you may just need to deal.
16. Pretty sure MP is the facilitator in this game. Given this is his site you best not piss him off.

#4909

Another stand up job by Jackofhearts, super townie. That’s 3 scum down by my efforts alone.

#4910

Turnip Head isn't really in Time Out by the way.

#4911

Even though Dunya apparently reads none of my posts.

#4912

MacDougall wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 8:56 pm Today's lynch has been cancelled due to technical difficulties as a result of paranormal activity.

Lol sounds legit.

This is my favorite non Hybridity game.

#4913

#4914

#4915

#4916

ok well that was a weird EoD. I don’t feel like the host is on the civs side.

On one hand, yay! Elo was in fact exactly what jjj suggested she was, and on the other, nut was lynched too. But that could have probably been avoided.

“But Scotty! You said you suspected her anyway so don’t get all high and mighty”
True, and I’m surprised at the result- I thought she was also bad. but it’s still frustrating. I like having an idea of the game at hand and I feel like the cards were stacked against civs randomly at the end there. Blech

Just feels fruitless

but I’ll keep trying. Still want speed lynched tomorrow, regardless of this outcome

on another note I’m working even mole this weekend so my participation will be dipping a lot, more than my paltry participation the last week

#4917

MacDougall wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 10:30 pm 1. Mostly standard TS rules with the additions of the below.
2. No roles are announced in this here post. People will claim them and what have you but I ain't confirming anything.
3. You are privy to the factions that are in this here game, but not their win cons.
4. Just play the game. Don't play out think the mod. I will mod-kill you.
5. If you are mod-killed just get out. Don't be a douche.
6. This is a meme game. Play it as such. I expect glorious quotes and many fun moments. That is the spirit of this game.
7. There are no vanillas. There are roles that can become vanilla and/or are passive but nobody starts pure nilla.
8. If anything is ambiguous just ask me and I will answer. It probably just means I haven't thought of it.
9. This is a bastard game. Don't get all upset when weird shit happens.
10. I will reveal the roles and alignments of the deceased. Most of the time.
11. It's okay to be a dick in this game but if you hurt someones feelings I will mod-kill you probably. Unless I don't.
12. If you don't contribute much I will mod-kill you probably.
13. My host posts gonna look like dis
14. We got the 48/24 thing happening.
15. I live in Australia so you might get some whack timezone situation you may just need to deal.
16. Pretty sure MP is the facilitator in this game. Given this is his site you best not piss him off.

Oh oh

Sorry

#4918

Jack: The demons that took Juliets took Sig. maybe we should try to figure out who the demon sockies are.

Jay: The demons are just a distraction.

Jack: But they took Juliets!

*three years later*

Dunya: Omg guys. I think the demons took Juliets and Sig. Did anyone else notice?

Scotty and Nutella: Phone posting is soooo hard. I can’t read what LC is saying. My phone thinks binary is a phone number.

Jack: I basically mafia on my phone only. Let me give you tips for how to copy the text on your phone.

Dunya: Phone posting is hard. I really respect phone posters, like CBob

dunya wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 9:10 pm
nutella wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 9:08 pm
dunya wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 9:06 pm Why do you townread TH?
He hasn't been afraid to state opinions that go against the grain. Everything he's posted has oozed genuineness
What about LC and Cbob?

I'm asking about people I'm not sure of.

I agree with your read on JoH. I need to iso him. I have a creepy feeling he's bad. It's not just the roleplay, he goofed around plenty in Ancient Greece too...but he's just very forgettable this game.

FFS....

**http://www.last.fm/user/nutella23** · #4919

Tepid fools

#4920

Jackofhearts2005 wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 11:04 pm Jack: The demons that took Juliets took Sig. maybe we should try to figure out who the demon sockies are.

Jay: The demons are just a distraction.

Jack: But they took Juliets!

*three years later*

Dunya: Omg guys. I think the demons took Juliets and Sig. Did anyone else notice?

Scotty and Nutella: Phone posting is soooo hard. I can’t read what LC is saying. My phone thinks binary is a phone number.

Jack: I basically mafia on my phone only. Let me give you tips for how to copy the text on your phone.

Dunya: Phone posting is hard. I really respect phone posters, like CBob

dunya wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 9:10 pm
nutella wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 9:08 pm
dunya wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 9:06 pm Why do you townread TH?
He hasn't been afraid to state opinions that go against the grain. Everything he's posted has oozed genuineness
What about LC and Cbob?

I'm asking about people I'm not sure of.

I agree with your read on JoH. I need to iso him. I have a creepy feeling he's bad. It's not just the roleplay, he goofed around plenty in Ancient Greece too...but he's just very forgettable this game.
FFS....

No, see whenever I quoted Lc’s posts and tried to select and drag, my phone would do this maniacal thing where it would scroll upwards and the numbers would all bug out like it was being possessed. I didn’t get through any of Lc’s posts that phase unless someone translated it.

#4921

But thanks for the tips anyway, jack :BART:

#4922

Scotty wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 11:12 pm But thanks for the tips anyway, jack :BART:

Ggrrr

#4923

Screenshots plz. Can’t troubkeshoot otherwise.

#4924

Jackofhearts2005 wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 11:16 pm Screenshots plz. Can’t troubkeshoot otherwise.

No one wants ur help dude

#4925

Turnip Head wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 11:19 pm
Jackofhearts2005 wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 11:16 pm Screenshots plz. Can’t troubkeshoot otherwise.
No one wants ur help dude

As evidenced by more people asking me to kill them than anything else.

Guess I’ll just catch all the baddies on my own. Nbd.

#4926

Jackofhearts2005 wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 11:20 pm
Turnip Head wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 11:19 pm
Jackofhearts2005 wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 11:16 pm Screenshots plz. Can’t troubkeshoot otherwise.
No one wants ur help dude
As evidenced by more people asking me to kill them than anything else.

Guess I’ll just catch all the baddies on my own. Nbd.

thx

#4927

Mafia is Colin, Dunya...probably like Speedchuck. Zeph.

There you go.

#4928

DDL and Jimmy are telling the truth cause I just know it.

#4929

That axe looks like it's compensating for something

#4930

Dat axx

#4931

Turnip Head wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 11:27 pm That axe looks like it's compensating for something

My car is tiny and my hair is greying.

Spoiler: show

#4932

As the town descended further and further into chaos, something else was brewing, something more natural.

Telecommunications lines were down, the internet was down, so when the Hurricane hit there was no warning.

Hurricane Katrina has hit the town.

JaggedJimmyJay has died.

He was

Spoiler: show

Jackofhearts2005 has died.

He was

Spoiler: show

Spacedaisy has died.

She was

Spoiler: show

Night 3 continues.

#4933

#4934

Woof.

#4935

Hurricane Katrina was in 2005

Jackofhearts2005

This cannot be coincidence

#4936

So I hear they're playing Mafia down in Narnia, it's supposed to be delightful. That's where I'm going now okay

#4937

Everyone can cum

#4938

Do we think there are more than 2 indies?

#4939

ColinIsCool wrote: ↑Fri May 25, 2018 11:41 pm Do we think there are more than 2 indies?

Who cares Colin, all our friends are dead

Just start looting or else get out while you still can

#4940

Um, that was serious.

#4941

This town is the only home I’ve ever known. I’m going down with it Mr. Head

#4942

16 players remaining, 19 if we include missing players ... scum teams of 3 or 4? I don’t know. Who the heck knows

#4943

#4944

The best part is that it's not even mod-kill o'clock yet.

#4945

We are so fucked.

#4946

#4947

#4948

This is what Infinity War felt like

#4949

So Golden, won't you please tell us all about this poll?

#4950

Jack was not the vanisher. Fuck me

But he was serious about killing people.

Whoever killed them (hurricane Katrina) probably isn’t town though because I felt like SpaceDaisy as town as shit. And jjj looked supatown too.

Who is around besides me?

Turnip Head? Luna?

Should U-Pick be an annual special game?