Vanilla Mafia - [MELTED]

[ColinIsCool]

Vanilla Mafia

ColinIsCool

Victors:
Epignosis - Frozen Bag of Vegetables
nutella - The Last Orange Popsicle


Dead at Endgame:
Lunalee - Elf Trash
MafiaMenace - Mint Chocolate Chip
novaselinenever - Rocky Road


Deceased Players:
Elohcin - Cotton Candy - Lynched Day 1
sabie12 - Blue Moon - Killed Night 1
WaywardSon - Replaced by novaselinenever Day 2
sprityo - Ice Cube Tray - Lynched Day 2
JaggedJimmyJay - Chicken Wing - Killed Night 2
Spacedaisy - Replaced by Lunalee Day 3
G-Man - Coffee Bacon - Lynched Day 3
Sloonei - Cherry Garcia - Killed Night 3
reywaS - Super Hero - Lynched Day 4


Rules

1. Everyone is vanilla, but nobody is Vanilla.
2. This is a closed set-up. There’s not that much to dump, anyway, but I figure you’d like to know. Player roles and alignments are revealed on all deaths.
3. Please do not edit or delete posts.
4. Please do not engage in BTSC (Behind the Scenes Conversation, or discussing ongoing game strategy and the like) outside of the appropriate channels provided to you and with anybody who isn’t your BTSC partner(s) assigned by the host.
5. Don’t do any other weird shit that goes against the nature of the game. This is Mafia, not … some other thing.
6. Please be respectful of all players and their desire to have some fun. We’re all friends here; remember the person behind the other monitor, and don’t be a dick.
7. If you are experiencing problems with the game of the butting-heads variety and want to vent, or want someone to send your Soundcloud to, speedchuck is serving as our faithful moderator. I think he’s got the plague, so if he isn’t responsive, feel free to give me a buzz and I’ll see what I can do.
8. Dead players and other zombies that feel the need to comment must post in dead red, or I’ll kill them again. Non-players can post in blue, but if you’re not playing, why didn’t you sign up in the first place, pal?
9. You can post off-topic in OT green if you want, but I’m not a stickler about that.
10. This is the host color, which I’ll post in unless it’s screwy on mobile. Please don’t use it, because it’s all mine!
11. Votes are changeable right up until the deadline. The EOD (end of day) tally will be found in a separate thread.
12. Day phases last 48 hours, Night phases 24, with the exception of Day 0. My hope is to have phases consistently change right around 9 p.m. EST, but should unforeseen difficulties arrive on my end, I’ll do my best to broadcast as such.
13. You can ask any questions you want in the thread. If I feel it merits a public answer, I will provide one, but remember that this is a closed set-up.
14. All players, alive or dead, will be declared champions should their team fulfill the standard Mafia win condition.
15. Ice cream does not contain pasteurized egg yolk, but frozen custard does.

[ColinIsCool]

I will be sending out role PMs when I return from an appointment in a couple of hours. There will be a check-in poll posted which has no relevance to the matter at hand. When the thread is unlocked, Day 0 will begin and last until 1/9/2019 at 9 p.m. EST, at which point Day 0 will begin.

[speedchuck]

Hei-ho! I'm your moderator for this delightfully simple game!

That means I'm here to listen and chat. If someone rubs you the wrong way, or things get tense, or your teammates are being frustratingly dense (I've been on both sides of all these things) then I am only a PM away. Most everyone on this site is great, and I'm happy to chat with you until we can all remember that.

If you just want to chat or complain, that's fine too.

Have fun, and good luck!

[ColinIsCool]

Role PMs have been sent out. If I fucked something up, please let me know!

Check in on the poll for Day 0 and mingle. Day 1 begins 1/9/2019 at 9 p.m. EST.

[Epignosis]

I'm going for Drew Breezy and company.

[nutella]

Who's winning what bowl now? I wanna win a nice bowl of ice cream.

[Sloonei]

The Patriots would be the most vanilla champions.

[G-Man]

Look! A game! I’m the most vanilla civvie that ever civved.

[Sloonei]

G-man’s chocolate.

[G-Man]

G-man’s chocolate.

LOL

[sprityo]

Let’s hope I don’t implode from playing two games at once because I’m a monkey brained fool.

Also Texas

[G-Man]

Los Angeles and New Orleans are far from vanilla cities. Philly fans are insane, so it’s out too. Bah-stin fans ahh ahhbnaahkshus after all their winning, so no to them. Texas in general has an unhealthy obsession with football at all levels. That leaves Kansas City and Indianapolis.

Kansas City at least knows how to barbecue. What’s Indy got? Mike Pence, auto racing, pharmaceutical companies, and Andrew “Stinkin’ Awesome” Luck. Yep, that takes it right there.

[Elohcin]

Why am I often thrown into two games at once. You sign up, months past, and then they both play at the same damn time.

[sabie12]

Oh I forgot the superbowl is a thing coming up in a few weeks huh? I'm more of a hockey fan so idk. I'll just have to pick something haha.

[sabie12]

My sister likes the eagles so I'll go with that.

Also hello everyone!

[G-Man]

Oh I forgot the superbowl is a thing coming up in a few weeks huh? I'm more of a hockey fan so idk. I'll just have to pick something haha.

Love finding other hockey fans. Who’s your team? NHL, AHL, international?

I’m surprised no one else checked in during the overnight hours. I’m used to waking up to a page or more to take in over breakfast. It’s still only Day 0 though, so this is not a big deal.

[JaggedJimmyJay]

Sloonei voted for the Patriots. This guy.

[Elohcin]

Epi...who should I vote for, sportsman?

[Epignosis]

Epi...who should I vote for, sportsman?

You could watch this replay of Allen Hurns, feel real bad, and vote for the Cowboys.

[sabie12]

Oh I forgot the superbowl is a thing coming up in a few weeks huh? I'm more of a hockey fan so idk. I'll just have to pick something haha.

Love finding other hockey fans. Who’s your team? NHL, AHL, international?

I’m surprised no one else checked in during the overnight hours. I’m used to waking up to a page or more to take in over breakfast. It’s still only Day 0 though, so this is not a big deal.

Hey cool I actually usually end up going to more local games. I live in New York state so I go to a lot of different games around the state. I'm also a big wrestling fan if anyone is into that.

And yeah I was surprised at how little posts there were. Usually it's hard to catch up on everything.

[reywaS]

[Sloonei]

Sloonei voted for the Patriots. This guy.

YEAH BRO YOU GAWT A PROBLEM?

[reywaS]

I fantasized bout this back in Chicago

[speedchuck]

I'm from Alabama. The mod/host/non option is a bit on the nose.

[sabie12]

Oh I forgot the superbowl is a thing coming up in a few weeks huh? I'm more of a hockey fan so idk. I'll just have to pick something haha.

Love finding other hockey fans. Who’s your team? NHL, AHL, international?

I’m surprised no one else checked in during the overnight hours. I’m used to waking up to a page or more to take in over breakfast. It’s still only Day 0 though, so this is not a big deal.

Hey cool I actually usually end up going to more local games. I live in New York state so I go to a lot of different games around the state. I'm also a big wrestling fan if anyone is into that.

And yeah I was surprised at how little posts there were. Usually it's hard to catch up on everything.

so to answer your question they're usually AHL teams I go see. Going to one this weekend fun fun!

[ColinIsCool]

I'm from Alabama. The mod/host/non option is a bit on the nose.

If Bama wants to beat the Raiders, they should try getting past Clemson first!

[speedchuck]

I'm from Alabama. The mod/host/non option is a bit on the nose.

If Bama wants to beat the Raiders, they should try getting past Clemson first!

Man, imagine if the CFB champions got an exhibition match each year with an NFL team. I'd watch the heck out of that.

[Elohcin]

Epi...who should I vote for, sportsman?

You could watch this replay of Allen Hurns, feel real bad, and vote for the Cowboys.

Oh my goodness. As long as the cheerleaders decide you have a come to Jesus moment and cover up.

[Sloonei]

This is probably the weakest Pats team of the decade. I'm actually worried about the divisional round opponent for the first time in years and I don't see them winning the Super Bowl this year. But then again....

[Epignosis]

Epi...who should I vote for, sportsman?

You could watch this replay of Allen Hurns, feel real bad, and vote for the Cowboys.

Oh my goodness. As long as the cheerleaders decide you have a come to Jesus moment and cover up.

Did you...watch the video?

[Elohcin]

yes, yes. It was awful. I know there were no cheerleaders in it, that was a side note.

[G-Man]

Oh I forgot the superbowl is a thing coming up in a few weeks huh? I'm more of a hockey fan so idk. I'll just have to pick something haha.

Love finding other hockey fans. Who’s your team? NHL, AHL, international?

I’m surprised no one else checked in during the overnight hours. I’m used to waking up to a page or more to take in over breakfast. It’s still only Day 0 though, so this is not a big deal.

Hey cool I actually usually end up going to more local games. I live in New York state so I go to a lot of different games around the state. I'm also a big wrestling fan if anyone is into that.

And yeah I was surprised at how little posts there were. Usually it's hard to catch up on everything.

so to answer your question they're usually AHL teams I go see. Going to one this weekend fun fun!

Lots of love for the AHL here! I live less than an hour from Hershey, PA. The Bears’ arena is amazing.

[ColinIsCool]

Day 1: A Cold Dish



Most people would not look outside their window to see an unending barrage of snow and cold and think "I'll have ice cream," but Colin was not like most people. If you had developed some lactose intolerance traits recently, you would be even less inclined to stuff a bowl full of milk product into your mouth — and while Colin suspected his body could no longer handle it without discomfort, he was resolved to eat some anyway. Readers may ask, given these facts, why would Colin feel that way; why ice cream?

The answer he would have given, had anybody rang him up and asked, would have been, "Because I'm a grown-ass man and I can eat ice cream if I want to."

Armed with a sense of righteous indignation and a sweet tooth that threatened his upcoming dentist visit, Colin peeked through the freezer in search of the perfect treat. Even though he rarely ate ice cream, a carton inevitably managed to grab his eye whenever he shopped for groceries. He found himself to have an embarrassment of riches and rich flavors: Butterscotch Sundae and Americone Dream, Birthday Cake and Bills Brownie Blitz. He didn't want anything with fruit, and Chocolate was a bridge too far this evening. After several minutes of focused, sweaty deliberation, he had settled on the evening's choice: simple, down-to-earth, delicious Vanilla.

He grabbed a bowl from the cupboard, prepared his dinner — three scoops, plain — and sat in front of the television, spoon in hand. The talking heads were predicting which of the teams would win all the way from this weekend's Divisional match-ups to the Super Bowl. Several had supporters, but to Colin's surprise, most had coalesced around the Dallas Cowboys, a team Colin loathed as a matter of principle, by birthright. "That's okay," Colin said to himself in between shovels of ice cream, "let Jerry's team get good again. It'll make Josh Allen trouncing them in back-to-back Super Bowls at the end of his rookie contract that much sweeter."

Sweet, indeed, such a victory would be — and sweet is this ice cream, he thought. Almost too sweet. Something about it had stuck in his throat. He coughed once, twice, three times before he knew something was wrong. A weakness to lactose shouldn't cause a reaction like this, he thought. He stumbled up from the couch, carrying the bowl with him into the kitchen. The coughs continued, rising in intensity, as went to get a glass of water. One big whoop caused him to drop the bowl on the floor, and then he himself fell, his body trembling. From the other room, he could hear that Chantix commercial with Ray Liota, until his own guttural wheezes drowned the sound out; as he shut his eyes, his last thoughts were of Goodfellas, and of Josh Allen.

An uncomfortable, long silence followed. The ice cream cartons heard everything, of course, but they didn't understand why Colin was now dead on his kitchen floor. Slowly they emerged, and their law enforcement conducted a forensic analysis. Its results shocked the freezer community: Vanilla had been tampered with, coaxed into acting as a poison. Any attempt at figuring out what inspired him to commit such an act of cruelty would be for naught, as Vanilla had sacrificed his own life, walked into his own point of melting, just so that Colin would die.

The next weeks for the ice cream cartons were a difficult and messy affair. The police determined that a group of Frozen Fiends had put Vanilla up to it, but couldn't say who they were or why they did it. After investigators failed to find a perp, much less an organized mafia, neighbors realized they couldn't trust one another — not with murderers out there, walking free. Freezer meetings on public safety turned into shouting matches turned into physical altercations. Families moved and friendships disintegrated. Ice cream cartons began arming themselves, prowling the streets with weapons, some of them aching for a reason to shoot. Things could not continue, not like this.

A plan emerged. A plan that was dangerous, a plan that could destroy them all, a plan that could be hard to live with if not executed to perfection. As difficult as it was, the town had no other idea what they could do. The modern judiciary had failed to save them, but maybe old-fashioned justice would prevail. A lynch would take place, and then another. They would exile their neighbors to melt in the sink one-by-one, until the last guilty party had been sentenced to death for their crimes. They would sate their taste for justice, or at least for blood.

Of course, the Freezer Fiends saw all this. They watched the ice cream cartons struggle and curse and collapse as a society. They knew they could use these lynches to their advantage — after all, they were better at opening the freezer door than most of these ice cream cartons, so they could help whittle the numbers down all the while. Go ahead and look for us, the Frozen Fiends said, chase your justice down. Chase your return to normalcy, your age of innocence. But don't be surprised what chases you back.

It is now Day 1. You have 48 hours to lynch someone.

[ColinIsCool]

I'm not sure why I can't get the poll to end at the right time, but it would be a help if you voted in the thread as well in the meanwhile. Poll ends at 9 p.m. EST Friday 10/11.

[ColinIsCool]

Day 0

Who will win Super Bowl LIII?

Kansas City Chiefs
0
No votes
Voters: None

New England Patriots
1
9%
Voters: Sloonei

Los Angeles Chargers
0
No votes
Voters: None

Indianapolis Colts
1
9%
Voters: G-Man

New Orleans Saints
2
18%
Voters: Epignosis, JaggedJimmyJay

Los Angeles Rams
0
No votes
Voters: None

Dallas Cowboys
3
27%
Voters: Elohcin, sprityo, reywaS

Philadelphia Eagles
2
18%
Voters: nutella, sabie12

Clemson Tigers (host/mod/non)
2
18%
Voters: speedchuck, ColinIsCool

[Epignosis]

I'm not sure why I can't get the poll to end at the right time, but it would be a help if you voted in the thread as well in the meanwhile. Poll ends at 9 p.m. EST Friday 10/11.

Full disclosure: I altered your poll time and changed it back. Check your time settings. Is the time right on your end? I don't know why your poll should be so off.

[ColinIsCool]

I'm not sure why I can't get the poll to end at the right time, but it would be a help if you voted in the thread as well in the meanwhile. Poll ends at 9 p.m. EST Friday 10/11.

Full disclosure: I altered your poll time and changed it back. Check your time settings. Is the time right on your end? I don't know why your poll should be so off.

It was not! I've straightened it out though. Thanks!

Enjoy the extra 17 minutes.

[G-Man]

Lame. A full quarter of the player list hasn’t checked in yet. Thank goodness for 48-hour days.

[Epignosis]

I'm not sure why I can't get the poll to end at the right time, but it would be a help if you voted in the thread as well in the meanwhile. Poll ends at 9 p.m. EST Friday 10/11.

Full disclosure: I altered your poll time and changed it back. Check your time settings. Is the time right on your end? I don't know why your poll should be so off.

It was not! I've straightened it out though. Thanks!

Enjoy the extra 17 minutes.

Glad I could be useful.

[Epignosis]

Lame. A full quarter of the player list hasn’t checked in yet. Thank goodness for 48-hour days.

Wait...wait...

You think...



Hold on...



You think people actually...

...use the 48 hour Day phases to do things?

[G-Man]

Laugh it up, fuzzball. It at least gives us more time to reflect on things, rather than living in the perpetual madness of a 24/24 setup. There will always be crazy EOD shenanigans but 48 hours gives us a longer buffer between the cray-cray. I need less cray-cray in my life. I’ll use the extra time wisely even if others don’t.

[Sloonei]

[VOTE: sprityo] aubergine

Let’s hope I don’t implode from playing two games at once because I’m a monkey brained fool.

Also Texas

Pre-emptive excuse for lack of participation. This man puts flavorful toppings on his ice cream.

[WaywardSon]

Checking in. Be back soon. EoD in progress....

[Epignosis]

Laugh it up, fuzzball. It at least gives us more time to reflect on things, rather than living in the perpetual madness of a 24/24 setup. There will always be crazy EOD shenanigans but 48 hours gives us a longer buffer between the cray-cray. I need less cray-cray in my life. I’ll use the extra time wisely even if others don’t.

[Epignosis]

Checking in. Be back soon. EoD in progress....

EXCUSES ON DEMAND

[nutella]

Fun post Colin.

[Epignosis]

Yeah fun post Colin.

(I didn't read it)

[WaywardSon]

OK. As nothing is happening at the moment I will check back in in the am.

[Epignosis]

OK. As nothing is happening at the moment I will check back in in the am.

What are you expecting to happen?

[Sloonei]

[mention]WaywardSon[/mention]
[mention]MafiaMenace[/mention]

Hello. We’ve never played together before. What can you tell me about yourselves? Where else have you played? What’s your experience and general approach to the game?